This week's manly quote:
"If life were predictable it would cease to be life, and be without flavor.”
- Eleanor Roosevelt
I came across a great quote this week by Dr. Vassilia Binensztok (@junocounseling on social media): "Some amount of trust is earned and some amount of trust is given. Trust is based on the behavior people show us PLUS our willingness to be vulnerable."
How often do we focus on just one of these wings? I imagine we can all relate to declaring someone untrustworthy after witnessing certain behavior without factoring in our own contributions. How much do our judgments color our reality? How many of our thoughts manifest as self-fulfilled prophecies? How willing are we to be vulnerable first?
And, of course, the opposite dynamic is also true. Do we forcefully stay vulnerable and open-hearted even when we feel unsafe? Are we misplacing our trust in others when it would be healthier to trust our own intuition and boundary setting?
As in all bird metaphors, flying requires both wings. Determining where we are on this spectrum of earning trust/observing behavior and giving trust/being vulnerable is individual and constantly changing. Remembering that we will flourish the most if both wings are attended to is most important.
Per usual, we will be practicing vulnerability tonight at our weekly men's circle, 6:30PM on the Zooms! Look forward to see you soon.